What happens to us men when our sons cannot fulfill our dreams, our expectations for them? What happens when the boy we dreamed of becomes one who will never throw a ball, never ride a bike, never go wading through the rivers, never play football with us? What happens when we cannot teach our boys to drive a car? What happens when we discover our boys may never have the opportunity to grow up to be men?
It takes courage
To examine our lives.
Are we men ready
To look through new eyes?
We men tend to "look toward tomorrow" when our sons can fulfill our dreams and expectations. But let us not look too far away or hold our dreams above our love and obligation* to our family. For it is not a boy's responsibility to meet or exceed expectations, that is the responsibility of a man.
*Yes, "Obligation".
(Also see The Clearest Image of a Man.)
Of course, Dear…,
I know I'm his father,
And I'm ready to start.
As soon as he's ready,
I'll do my part.
He really is cute!
But he's really too small.
Just as soon as he's ready,
We'll have a ball!
But for now, don't you see?
The job's really Mom's.
But as soon as he's ready,
Dad's got open arms.
For Mom's job is full
Of the day-to-day stuff.
But the father's job
Is much more tough.
I'll teach him to throw,
Help him ride a bike,
And as soon as he's ready,
We'll go on a hike.
First day of school?
I can't take him today.
But as soon as he's ready
To run bases, we'll play.
I know he's got problems,
But don't dwell on that, Dear.
And as soon as he's ready,
I'll be right here.
The doctor's appointments?
You can handle that.
And as soon as he's ready,
We'll swing a bat.
See, I'm always supportive,
For that's a Dad's job,
And as soon as he's ready,
We'll fish with a rod.
Fifth grade science?
Now that job is Dad's!
So as soon as he's ready,
We'll walk through some labs!
I'm sorry, Dear,
He's just much too slow,
But as soon as he's ready,
We really will go.
High school football?
Oh…, announcing the game…
Well, as soon as he's ready,
Something not so lame,
See, when he is playing
You know I will care,
So as soon as he's ready
I'll be right there.
The auditorium?
To watch him debate?
No, as soon as he's ready
To graduate.
Take the boy out?
He needs Mommy's care.
But as soon as he's ready,
Dad will be there.
I know he is older,
Almost sixteen,
And as soon as he's ready,
For the dating scene…
But it's not my job
To give him a ride,
So as soon as he's ready,
I'll teach him to drive.
He's going to dance?
A boy in a 'chair?
Sure…, as soon as he's ready,
You take him there.
He's angry at me?
Whose broken whose dreams?
As soon as he's ready,
He'll stop his screams.
See, I've worked very hard
To make his life grand,
And as soon as he's ready,
He'll understand.
No…, the hospital's too crowded,
I'll talk on this phone,
But as soon as he's ready,
You bring him home.
They will try everything
That money can buy,
But as soon as he's ready…
We are now by his side,
Our boy's life is dim,
And as soon as he's ready,
We will bury him.
I honestly thought
We'd do more one day,
But since he was ready,
Angels took him away.
www.DoctorBach.com
Dr. Bach's Articles: ©2000-2004, John R. Bach, MD, used by permission.
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